I Just showed up, for my own life. Or maybe just returned to it..

Wow. The roller coaster of this semester is twisting and turning way too quickly, and way too much. Its slowing down. I still have tons on my plate, but let me just describe to you, how God is.

Humility is a bold thing to pray for. I got it. In a hard way. I learned a tough lesson this week. I cried. Multiple times. For multiple reasons. One main lesson though: I was dead wrong. I learned to give something over to the Lord, in which I did, which was scary and bold, and the answer I received was the fear I dreaded. However, God is gracious. He showed me mercy and kindness undeserved once again.

Today, I cried tears of relief and joy. I finally saw beauty again. Beauty within pain, joy in pain, and most importantly God. I love how He loves me. I love how He created me. I am glad He made me to enjoy aesthetically pleasing things. I used to love sunrises and sunsets and simple things like green grass. I have allowed myself to become distracted and forgotten these simple yet amazing gifts. Every new day given, oh such a blessing. I cried tears of joy this morning, after literally living out Psalm 30: 5 "Weeping my tarry for the night but joy comes in the morning" Literally, its did. The pain is gone, the confusion fading away, God has taught me much in a period of one week. Looking back, more like a month, I just didn't see it.

I feel like a new person. For real. God has renewed that steadfast spirit within me that is mentioned in Psalm 51:10. At the church I've been attended recently, Psalm 23 was preached in such as new way this past way. The Lord is my Shepard, who knows my needs before I do. He has provided all I need thus far, why be in want?

Sunsets, sonnets, brave &loving friends(who tell you how it is), godly wisdom, a new start, a good new friend, restoration, the list continues.

I really want to play the piano again, and write a song.

I love my student teaching.

I have a wonderful friend,Christi, who has helped me through a difficult issue, and was brave to tell me the truth, even though it hurt. I love this girl and I am beyond grateful for her.

I got to hug the kids at work again today.

I love being a emotional, melancholy, introvert and want to fully embrace who God made me.

I miss being artsy, poetic, and musical. I love that God put these desires in my heart and allows me to use them.

God's love is constant, and He reveals it to me in so many new ways, even in my mistakes.

Spring break is almost here. I look forward to rest and more growth.

I deleted my facebook, rather impulsively but it was needed and I love my new computer screen background, fresh dew on morning grass.

That is all.